The Glass Bead Game

I spent last few days reading the magnum opus of Herman Hesse , The Glass Bead Game. After going through some tiresome forty pages of introduction, I began with the life of Joseph Knecht, who was born into twenty-fifth century, according to our author.

This book is not an ordinary novel or biography, it demands your participation. While reading it , I had to pause many times for short meditation and contemplation exercises. I enjoyed them truly and found them fruitful.

Castalia , the educational province had a fine sketch and a major role to play in the book.

I realized that my experience of Banasthali helped me to get the idea of Castalia. They both are aloof from the outside world. In the period after Banasthali , I have often longed for the childlike innocence and simplicity of Banasthali Life. But this dichotomy of life is presented in many forms in the book.

The subject of dichotomy brings Blake to my mind. He had said , ‘Without contraries is no progression’. The crux of his “Songs of Innocence” and “Songs of Experience” is that both innocence and experience are required for the development of soul. This experience is not something evil or worldly but a belief that truth is not simple or blissful. And this perhaps what Knecht realized later in his life and resigned from the post of Magister. He craved for risks, sufferings and worldly experiences. The innocence, chastity , intellectual freedom of Castalian life would not provide for the other side of his soul.

And It’s not only about being aware of dichotomies but about crossing the threshold of known to the realms of unknown. Knecht , in his childhood , had called it “a leap”. In his own words, “ But I do wish that if ever time comes and it proves to be necessary, that I too will be able to free myself and leap, only not backward into something inferior but forward into something higher.”

Freeing oneself – sounds so blissful. But it isn’t always easy to free yourself. When you grow your consciousness of the Life consisting of different stages and your ultimate goal would be something higher than things related to the World and aspirations of present life, you would be able to free yourself. You would move swiftly, firmly and without fear or regrets to the next stage , even if it is the period after promising youth or death.

Stages - a poem by Hermann Hesse , From Glass Bead Game

As every flower fades and as all youth
Departs, so life at every stage,
So every virtue, so our grasp of truth,
Blooms in its day and may not last forever.
Since life may summon us at every age
Be ready, heart, for parting, new endeavor,
Be ready bravely and without remorse
To find new light that old ties cannot give.
In all beginnings dwells a magic force
For guarding us and helping us to live.
Serenely let us move to distant places
And let no sentiments of home detain us.

The Cosmic Spirit seeks not to restrain us
But lifts us stage by stage to wider spaces.
If we accept a home of our own making,
Familiar habit makes for indolence.
We must prepare for parting and leave-taking
Or else remain the slave of permamence.
Even the hour of our death may send
Us speeding on to fresh and newer spaces,
And life may summon us to newer races.
So be it, heart: bid farewell without end.

With Keats

Half of the morning today I spent with Keats. I have read him several times and this revision was a sort of reunion. When you read and penetrate into a beloved writer at different stages of your life, you happen to come close to him more and more.

Its quite funny to recollect, how for the first time when I read Keats’ quote , “A thing of beauty is a joy for ever.” (Endymion) I felt repulsion towards him. An instant hatred. Which anyone in my mind’s status would have felt. Perhaps I thought myself too ugly or un-beautiful. I saw this beauty in relation with physical beauty. How trifle my mind had been at that time. When after few years of that misunderstanding I read ‘Ode to Grecian Urn’ and its famous quote, “Beauty is Truth and truth beauty, All ye know, and need to know on earth.” I was perplexed. I didn’t accuse him or anything but I tried to go into deep and find what truth he had to present here. But again I couldn’t dive into the meaning easily.

Keats to me seems to be an Icon of Youth – a dreamy youth. And also of a path to Truth which worships Beauty. To an ordinary person this may sound ridiculous, for beauty and truth seems two poles apart. But if you telescope, you find them synonyms. And to avert the prejudice against Keats philosophy you need to speculate upon all his poems. For  Keats beauty does not only dwell in joyful things but it also resides in Melancholy. Scenes, things or feelings which arise melancholy may also be beautiful because there has some truth in them too, and so death also contains beauty in it. Truth and Beauty are thus inseparable.

Keats had a fine eye for beauty. And this is truly wonderful. Though the path of beauty to Truth sounds the best and without sorrows and struggles but this is not so. For Keats’ own life is an example of the perils, pains and sufferings one has to face in spite of choosing such perfect seeming path. In all Odes of Keats , the Melancholic note is prominent. His joy of beauty is not without the sorrows.

Keats aspires for the eternal beauty in the form of immortal Nightingale but he also finds beauty in the Songs of Autumn. This beauty has two facets. And both are welcomed by Keats. He is definitely not an idealist and escapist. He knows the reality of the world – the world of mortal sufferings and still he is able to find his song in it.

As I had said above, when you a love an author you gradually find a parallel of him inside you. You discover your own face which is akin to him. For a romantic, Keats could be such a beloved author. He is so natural , so ingenious and so very profound that you can take a walk with him time and again.  

My dear Anna...

I was mere an adolescent when I first read a Tolstoy’s story. It was a remarkable story about a wife’s dream of her husband who has snow white hairs instead of black which sadly comes true at the end. This fictional dream hunted me for long.

Mystery of dreams and intuitions always engage my deepest attention. I still remember how I had felt after reading Tolstoy’s story .  And same I felt again after reading Anna Karenina by Tolstoy. For me , this epic fiction oscillates between a super-realistic dream and an awareness of corporeal world and human relations.

 

Though being world’s greatest fiction it deals with every aspect of mundane life but what really attracted me was psychological struggles of major characters. Where Lenin strives for Katie’s love and later to feel God’s blessings , Alexei suffers and tries to overcome the blow on his sophisticated social life. Dolly chooses to accept her husband’s character as a philanderer and thus lives a spurious life like other major characters except Anna. Anna doesn’t love her husband and later begins to feel for Count Vronsky. She spurns to live a double life as offered by her husband who doesn’t really care whom her wife loves but wants to save his reputation. But Anna can not sacrifice her honesty and so chooses to be an outcast by living with Vronsky without a formal divorce with her husband.

“Can one ever tell anyone what one’s feeling?” Anna asks to herself towards the end. And this question can pose more somber one in a reader’s mind, “Can one ever know anyone ? Or even oneself?”  … “the struggle for existence and hatred is the one thing that holds men together. No it’s a useless journey you are making.”  Anna is talking to herself. Human relations and the motives behind one’s action are very intricate to understand. Self-interest , consciously or unconsciously overshadows love most of the times.

We perished , each alone ,

But I beneath a rougher sea… (As Mr. Ramsay mumbles in To The Lighthouse)

And yet why should the life be ended like this? Why our faith should diminish when hope is a lifeline given to us by God? The novel ends along with Levin’s struggle. After Anna’s episode is left unresolved and romantically ended , it is through Levin Tolstoy gives the Mantra to his deserving reader. But that mantra is like a precious gem which reader must seek and bring out himself . 

P.S. -

To my Anna , 

 Immoral , moral , or beyond that (as my teacher used to say – nothing is moral or immoral) , my Anna I don’t judge you , will never. Because I know you listened to your heart and did what you needed to do because you could have never done otherwise. Only human eyes see tragedy otherwise there is no such thing called a tragedy. Life goes on , and there is an afterlife and so on and so forth…we born ,  we learn , we perish and only wisdom we carry with us… you also did , I am sure… and you have won my heart my dear Anna...

A different look at my favorites : Raja Hindustaani

Sundays were always favorite of mine in schooldays. Not only due to holiday but because I would get to watch the movies whole day. God knows how many times I have watched KKHH , K3G , Ishq and other frequent movies on lazy Sundays.

But one of my all time favorite is - Raja Hindustaani. I love specially its songs and Karishma's character , exemplifying - Beauty with Simplicity.

Education changes our perception. And I realized it yesterday. I noted some significant gestures and silences in the movie , without which the deeper  meaning can not be grasped.

First , the silences and facial expressions of Aamir through out the song - Pardesi pardesi jana nahi... (I just love the song)

Secondly , the meaningful look on Karishma's face through out her marriage and the song - Aaye ho meri zindagi mein ... When they sit in mandap , and she looks at Aamir , the look so penetrating , can make your soul shiver. It is a look given by a girl who has left her home (her world) and is going to marry a man she loves. But there is a fear in that look. As if she is afraid of uncertain future , the step she has taken and more , whether the man understands her or will understand.

Whole of this scene is a foreshadow of future which is destructive of their newly constructed world. The lyrics of the song and girl's expressions at that time also foreshadow future's catastrophe. It is rather surprising to see so much of subtlety in Bollywood's cinema. Kudos for the whole team of the movie.

Below is my most favorite song from the movie -

http://lyricstranslate.com

Aaye ho meri zindagi mein, tum bahar banke
Mere dil mein yunhi rahna, tum pyar pyar ban ke
Ankhon mein tum base ho, sapne hazaar ban ke
Mere dil mein yunhi rahna, tum pyar pyar ban ke- Aaye ho,,,

Mere saathi mere sajan, mere saath yun hi chalna
Badalega rang zamana, par tum nahi badalna
Meri mang yun hi bharna, taare hazaar ban ke
Mere dil mein yun hi rahna, tum pyar pyar ban ke

Agar main jo rooth jaoon, to tum mujhe manana
Thama hai haath mera, phir umr bhar nibhana
Mujhe chod ke na jana, wade hazaar kar ke
Mere dil mein yun hi rahna tum pyar pyar ban ke---Aaye ho...

For its English Translation refer this site - http://lyricstranslate.com/en/aye-ho-meri-zindagi-mein-female-aaye-ho-meri-zindagi-mein-female.html

Of the most poetic times : Young mind and Old age

Old Age is degrading

Big Brother is watching you. No its not political. Its completely familial. Our big brother is our Granddad. His eyes always follow us where ever we go. He fusses over little inconveniences and its completely natural. But what seems unnatural to us is , that he is always agitated. He keeps mala (for chanting) in one hand , ram naam on his lips but his eyes always wander about room and sometimes we suspect they follow us to our bedrooms also. Why someone who is on brink of his life should be so restless? Couldn't he even gather enough peace in his heart all his life?

Once when I was sitting beside him , as it is an order from our parents , as soon as I saw that he is fast asleep , slowly I was trying to stand up from my 'Hot Seat' , and not an inch I must have stood up that he opened his hollow eyes , reminding me of this famous tag from Orwell's classic Nineteen Eighty Four , "Big brother is watching you."

I am sorry if I make it seem flippant. It is serious for us , for him. I overheard today my mom dad's conversation. No , rather just an observation. Dad said  (indicating Gdad's helpless condition) , " This is hell." " Yes. It is only heaven till our hands and legs are working." , replied Mom. And I , who was too removed from psychic state of my parents , got to confront it rather too harshly. They are moving toward old age. Too slowly or too fast , this only they know. But they seem too old all of a sudden when they talk like this. I am no seven year old , and so I must understand what all I am seeing and listening.

These days are so poetic. Strange but true. And the poetry is that of old age and death. I don't like to call it a dirge (death song). Individuals interpret it their own way. And moreover , death is better than Old Age. A common notion shared by all of us. Except Gdad , I suppose. He is in love with medicines as a poet is in love with his muse. His words ditch his desires - 'Bas ab toh bhagwan utha le... ' and after five minutes , ' Arey Omez (calcium tablet) dena...'

Its okay , we all say. One can't help it at such times. And such times make one all the more a religious thinker. Its been hardly three days I have come at home and I am learning everything. Learning the ways of 'old age' , the ways of 'elder' , the ways of 'society' and the ways one has to choose for oneself. Its a struggle. But that of a caterpillar who turns into beautiful butterfly. I hope it is that beautiful.

Near the End : I , We and The Dying Man

I dont know I should write it or no.And I dont know whether I will be to able to convey my emotions honestly and objectively. But all I know is, that I need to write it. I just read Shannon Hayes's article "Saying goodbye : What do we teach kids about death ? ", which begins with the words - "My grandfather is dying." And I felt goose bump in my stomach. My grandfather is also dying. But unlike her , I am far away from him. Unlike her , I don't feel much for him. Unlike her , I don't feel it... feel it deeply.Perhaps it is because I am five hundred miles away from him or I am not sure , if I would have felt same , were I near  him at his bedside. Perhaps , it doesn't move me because he is old and I want his sufferings to end. Or perhaps it is just a poor ingenuine excuse. I feel ashamed and at the same time I know number of my relatives who come to visit him daily , feel the same thing , perhaps more cruelly than me. 

In her article , Shannon Hayes suggests , why don't we let the kids experience it, when death is working slowly with any of our dear ones. As a child , she was kept away from such experiences. But as a mother , she chooses to let her children see their great grandfather dying. She wants them to understand that death is not an end , its just a transition. She wants them to experience the unity and love the family shows to her grandfather. She wants them to learn to make something beautiful of even such dreadful event. 

Though I am moved not directly , but it is painful to see my mother and her efforts to bring me solace. I am sure she is strong and can deal with it but she thinks of me too frail. She would call up these days and in her wavering voice tell me things like - you don't worry beta , everything will be fine , he (grandpa) is feeling well now ... sometimes when things are worst she would try to hide them but her words would ditch her - how are you , how is your preparation going on? , concentrate on your studies , dont worry about grandpa , God will take care of everything , everything will be fine , ok , you dont worry , 'apne aap ko sambhalna' ... and so on... and I would later come to know that at that time Grandpa was seriously ill. 

I wonder , what make them think that I will be too moved or disturbed to concentrate in studies. How little they know of me. How little parents know of the inner growth of their children. How little generally  they are concerned with such things. I would in fact have liked to be there and feel the death working mysteriously with my granddad , to observe the effect it creates on different people , to explore the reactions and actions of my relatives. And of course , I would have liked to trace the minutest change occurring in my granddad's psyche and heart. 

But is it always that toward the end of life , realization comes? Realizations about the deeds of past , about the nature of life and about the nature of death itself. I think its an individual thing. It is like , whether person is theist or atheist externally , the realization of God may come or may not come to him , it solely depends on their internal (spiritual) life and not external. 

I think I would have moved , and moved deeply , if I would have seen a little bit of realization on my grand father's part. But I am disappointed. And still , I think this incident is leading me toward some realization. Realization of my duties - duty to serve him unconditionally , irrespective of his attitudes. Ultimately , my life will continue and later not serving him whole heartedly may hinder my peace of mind. And perhaps giving my hundred percent may give me a chance to see the essential of a human being - bare soul of a dying man. Sure it would be some reward. But I imagine of a more wild thing , of a more ethereal reward -  of the transformation of his soul before it leaves his petite body. And if anything I pray for him , I pray for this realization - Realization of Transformation.

India v/s Pakistan

I have something to say about Today's match between India and Pakistan. Although after one day I have my exam , but I know this is the right moment to say what I feel so I would continue.

All I want to say is - Lets pray that India wins. But not that Pakistan loses. In the same way , though in different context , as we say being positive , that the cup is half full , and not half empty.

Most of the times , specially when the match is between India and Pakistan , we forget that its a game. Media misguides people and infuses unhealthy spirit of competition. We also this way increases extra pressure on the players.Ironically and unconsciously we are responsible for the poor performance of theirs. And later we accuse them for not performing well , when we are no one to do so unless we prove that we can play better than they have played.

It is inevitable that one team will lose and other will win. And if we lose , it will be due to errors on our part. But then its Just a game. If not this time , we will come back with more refined skills. Accusations can never help. And the right approach would be to encourage for tomorrow's performance than accuse for today's loss.

Treat Game as a game and not like War.And treat Pakistan just like any other country because any wrong idea you convey will come back to you with double force and even if it doesn't ,  the misguided vibes you throw , harm the grace of your own personality and peace of your mind.

India was always a land of monks and sadhus who believed in making a Balance between contrary emotions and will ever be this spirit inside us whether we recognize it or no. And sooner we recognize , better for us as both individuals and Indians. Whether India wins or loses in the match today , it will never lose its spirit to perform better, poise and humanitarian values. So cheers for the spirit and not the demonstration because later is a matter of moment which comes and goes , but the spirit is eternal which always flows...

The man who burnt himself ...

Only a week has passed since the day when the world with its horrified eyes saw Japan drowning and burning in the flames of our planet's destiny. But yesterday when Rajesh Meena burnt himself in Sawai Madhopur , was it destiny ? Or the negligence of Government? Which is more tragic ? Death by Calamity or death because of Neglect ? 

A man sacrificed himself on the altar of Justice which was denied to an old female brutally murdered by dacoits in Sawai Madhopur. This young man , fighting for justice , burnt himself when government played with people - "we are deaf and blind" game. 

This is happening too far - in Rajasthan only - but too far from my place yet in nights I am not able to sleep. Cacophonous words ring in my ear - "This is the Ghor Kalyug." Not because nature is taking its revenge upon us for our exploitation of her but even human being have crossed their limits of all 'taamsik pravrati' (Devil instincts) 

Now lets clap in appreciation as the CI , who had been burnt by angered mass , is announced to be dead as a 'Shaheed' and his family is being awarded 25 Lakh and so n so . (Of course, This must be all Planned) . And the man who died as Rajesh Meena , after sometime will be forgotten by media and government and become an "anonymous." 

Yes 'Anonymous'. Becuase this is Kalyug. And the 'Destruction till Doomsday' has already begun.  But Rajesh's sacrifice will not be forgotten by people and this a miniature 'Satyug' in today's Kalyug. People will remember his sacrifice and after all sacrifices by people like him - Satyug will dawn again. 

Magic is in each moment : Guzaarish

On Sunday I watched the movie Guzaarish. And I hated the movie. I hated it because it didn't let me weep ( as I must when something touches me deeply ). It formed tears in one deep corner of my heart , it brought them to my eyes and before I could shed them , it said mischievously , खरी है खोटी है , रोने को छोटी है ... सौ ग्राम ज़िन्दगी , संभालके खर्ची है...

It was a wonderful movie. It begins with a song which is about Smiling and living life at fullest , but soon we learn that the protagonist wants to submit a petition of Euthanasia i.e. Mercy-killing in court. That's an irony. For protagonist the journey is difficult. He is being misunderstood by his friends and those who revere him as an ideal because after his accident for twelve long years he was paralyzed and yet he inspired millions to fight and live and people thought now he himself is leaving the battle. I thought the same. But as the movie progressed I began to love the Magician (protagonist) and the moment I felt love for him I wished him death to stop his pain. 

It is a rare skill of knowing when to quit honorably. Quit , here simply means , to leave the ground when you think it is right time to leave. At any turning point of our life , we should remember , it is our own life and not of those who love us. So the decisions should be ours and not theirs. Suppose they take our decisions , will they come and bear its consequences - No. 

Well at the core of the movie there is Magic. The protagonist is a Magician. But why magic has been shown as his profession?  Because Magic is something we perform and witness every second and does not value it. What is magic , by the way? A trick , an illusion? What is life? An  illusion - as most of saints tell us. And what is happiness? Wise men tell us , its a trick. And what's a trick? Which we ourselves perform. So isn't it our own choice to be happy and live thankfully. Thankfully because God gave us this magic to perform. Now its up to us how beautifully we perform it. 

I bet Sanjay Leela Bhansali has performed his magic very well. Once in a while , such movies show us a ray of hope for Indian Cinema. We have almost forgotten that Cinema is an art and it should be treated as an art. Rat bitten scripts , cheap comedy , cliche dialogues and poor cinematography is offered to us on the name of Cinema. Guzaarish , on the contrary (to me at least) seems to be an artist's work. It had superb script , significant dialogues and very well acting - a combo pack. And yes , how can I forget about beautiful songs? They are wonderfully written and composed. 

I think the movie deserves at least one watch. And mind please , a careful watch , without prejudices. And remember one dialogue from it always - 

Life is short,

Break the rules, 

forgive quickly, 

kiss slowly, 

love truly, 

laugh uncontrollably, 

And never regret anything that made you smile. 

Life , Love , Hope - A documentary

Aids Home , where innocent children are doomed to spend a life without real life , love and hope. But this wonderful movie shows how goodness can win over the circumstances. 

A little girl of seven or eight years , teaches everyone including the audience the values we boast to have but we have them only in our theories. She saves a man's life who kept himself aloof from her just because she is the patient of Aids. The man was bullied and hit by drunkards in the night . She heard the noise and went out to help the man and thus she saved his life. He learns the lesson and next day comes to thank her by gifting her a huge dairymilk. 

Now the second clip begins. Love. She has got her reward. The watchman teaches her an adult lesson of selfishness. He asks her to go behind the building to eat her chocolate in isolation. She says okay. But cleverly calls her all friends to have a share from her chocolate. Now the problem is there is only one dairymilk among 10-15 children. But the little resolute girl has huge mind like her huge heart. She uncovers her chocolate and shows it to the sun . Due to the heat the chocolate becomes liquid and thus everyone dips the finger and tastes the ethereal thing. 

One night her friend sobs looking at the moon while everyone is asleep. She , the sensitive one wakes up hearing her cries and goes to her. Here she becomes the angel of hope for that another girl. She tries to find out what makes her friend cry. And then she comes to know that her friend is missing her mother who is probably dead due to Aids. Her friend asks her, "Where is my amma , why doesn't she come to me." She points toward the moon and says . "Your amma is there and looking at you." Her friend asks , "How do you know?" She says . " I know because my amma is also there. And when she went she told me to take care of myself and others. " And then she tells that because our amma is watching over us , we have to take care of ourselves and be happy or they will be sad to see us crying. At this moment the moon is focused. And one is not able to restrain tears. A little girl on the threshold of uncertain future and death talks about hope and spreads love and is full of vigor and life . After watching this movie, I am compelled to think about the ways of our life , our sorrows , our failures , our hopelessness , our efforts to spread happiness around when we are still physically and mentally able. 

The movie becomes more poignant because of the contrast of the worst hopeless situation of that girl and her goodness which makes her full of life , love and hope.I would request everyone to watch this movie. It may bring back your life to you. And I would recommend volunteers of the different NGOs who work with children to show this movie to the children because the girl of the movie is a child and the act of a child can inspire other child effectively than anything else. I would also like parents to collect the DVDs of such inspiring movie. Like junk food junk bollywood movies damage the mind of children and do not provide the vitamins of values properly ,in such case the documentary movies of these kind can prove a healthy dose. I am aware of the fact that the market of these kind of movies is still underdeveloped but I hope in near future inspiring documentaries would be easily available in the market or on internet and would be largely watched by people.  

Here is one clip of the documentary , I suppose it is the clip of the title - Love. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LheYcD_7TKw

Sufferings and Misery : three documentaries

VILLAGE OF WIDOWS (Ashoke Pandit) -

We live a simple life on plains and dream of the exquisite beauty of Kashmir valley but those who live there have no time to feel the privilege. The place is a so called heaven on earth. In reality , that's hell in the dress of heaven. Yes it is indeed. There is a village which is known as a village of widows , having about 250 widows and many orphans. The men of these widows were either abducted or forcefully taken to Pakistan millitant to train as terrorists. They were killed while trying to run away.   They all hadn't choose to become terrorists and so they were suspected by Indians and tortured by Pakistanis. But even if some of them chose - what was the crime of their wives and children? They live miserably , without a grain or cloth in the house. Powerful men snatch their lands and even their more precious daughters . And they say people come and click their photos but provide no help.  This beautiful valley will mourn in silence until someone will hear the cries of these widows.

A CRIME IN SILENCE (  Behrouz Nouranipoor)

In this movie I came across the most hideous face of life. Death would have been better than such sufferings. Allah give them happiness! I am talking about those children who have distorted faces (pimples and swellings all over their face) due to the chemical weapons used by Iraq in the period of Saddam Hussein. The mother told the whole village is suffering . The person who was responsible for such bombings, got death sentence but the mother spitefully says he deserves more worst death than this. The kids are unbearable to see and hear , not because they are very ugly but because they still talk of hope and happy marriage and career. Younger boy wants to become a doctor while he is on the verge of losing his sight and daughter almost eighteen year old , dreams of a handsome groom.... Why God let happen such things in the world - and to these innocence ones... one can't console oneself but hide his face and weep In Silence.

 EK NAYI SOCH (Ketan J Pandya)

When humans can kill their brothers and neighbours , there is no hope for animals. Only because they can not express their feelings we have not got the rights to exploit them. Why do we kill them for our food and luxury ? If we let them live , our many needs will be fulfilled.  To kill an animal is as much a crime as to kill a human being. Don't we have already the curse of many crimes upon our head , why do we take more when it is in our hands to avoid it. You won't like when someone butcher you and eat you ? Then say no to Non-Veg. Say no to animal products. Save animals and make this earth more better. If you are still taking this matter lightly , watch this movie , you might feel the pain of animals.

These three splendid movies made me realize - The yoke on my shoulder is very light. I shall carry the burden with smile on my face and try - try my best to bring smile on other's face.  

When tradition kills ...

Everyone wants a Mother , a Wife but no one ... no one wants a Daughter. Why?

Riwayat , a movie directed by Vijay Patkar , raises this question .  It says , that a journal stated , till now about one hundred million girls are missing from the world . They are missing because they are dead . They have been brutally killed due to the mind-set of people , due to the hideous tradition , according to which a daughter is the root of several problems so there is only one solution - kill her as soon as she is born.

The movie revolves around three females who adopt different ways to cope up with this problem. High-class, Deepika , committs suicide when she is hopeless. Low-class , Radha can not even in her dream charge against her husband who , she knows, killed her third daughter. But Middle class Anita , the protagonist , refuses to abort her girl child and leaves her husband's house.

A very beautiful song is played when she recalls her past when she left her husband - आंसू कभी छलके  न , मोती बिखर  जायेंगे , ओ साथिया... सच के रास्ते पर चलोगे तो वो भी आजमाएगा...
It says that even God takes your test if you decide to walk on a right path.

It was a wonderful movie. It shows that one person , if s/he is determined can bring the change in society . But the most important thing is - Raising our voice against bad practice. I know many girls (some of are my friends) who are married and oppressed by the thought that they are expected to give birth to a Boy . It is time now - It is we , ourselves , the girls , the wives , the mothers who should raise our voice and fight the battle against this brutal Mind - Set. I hope that the day would soon come when the so - called equality will also reflect in the numbers of females on males per state.

The official website of movie - http://www.riwayatmovie.com/

The Last Song by Nicholas Sparks

But when the Holy Spirit controls our lives, he will produce this kind of fruit in us: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.” – Galatians 5:22

Reading is an art and it works exactly like molding an earthenware into a shape. How the shape is that depends on what you have read. The Last Song by Nicholas Sparks is a book that I wonder how much it shaped my heart more than my mind. I was always fascinated by the values of Western Culture. And everyone assumes on the name of Western Culture something else - something a vicious form of liberty but no , I mean it by what we have in this novel - exactly this - liberty with an overwhelming belief in Goodness.

It surely is a romantic novel but there is something more in the foreground and i.e. the father - daughter relationship , which I just loved about this book. Unlike other romantic novels , it also focuses on family, bringing up of children and friendship.

Its the story of faith and true love. When the couple Megan and Daniel moves into the sacrament of marriage they take vows , written by themselves which is just amazing -

They promised patience when it was easy to be impatient, candor when it was easier to lie, and in their own ways, each recognized tha fact that real commitment could be proven only through the passage of time.

We do many mistakes in our lives but some people can't forget themselves for what they did. Steve teaches her daughter , Ronnie to learn to forgive herself before anything else. The way Ronnie learns her most important lessons in life while spending the summer with her father whom she has not spoken for last three years because of a misunderstanding (and a little suspense) is the core of the novel.

If you love Sparks you cant miss the book and even if you have never read him and want to change the flavour , make it on the top of your "To-Read" book list. And I must tell you one last thing , go for the book before watching the movie. Book is the real thing and I am sure it will give you another feeling than the movie.

New Year Movie : go for Benhar

A pretty old movie of three and half hours !

We just wanted to pass the time and thought there is no harm watching a boring movie , as we thought it would be , than doing nothing at all. So we watched and not a single minute we felt anywhere that its boring .In fact we liked it more than contemporary comedy movies.  I suppose if you will google for it , you might not even get it , its this much old.

Its a christian movie. But its much more than just  that. Its about the belief in Miracles , belief in God's ways , belief in one self. It teaches Christ's message of love and forgiveness . And it unfailingly reminds of Gandhi ji. 

No matter what love and forgiveness wins and they are the power of real courage and not the revenge and hatred. This reminds me of one of Atticus' teachings to his children in To Kill A Mocking Bird , that avoid with your head up and walk on if someone teases you but don't fight with them . He says they are your friends though sometimes they may be wrong but it doesn't mean that they are bad. And this echoes Jesus Christ's last words when he was crucified - God forgive them , they don't know what they are doing. The movie ends with this thought - provoking lines ... 

Why! wouldn't it be relevant today if you wanna adopt this attitude? --- I said Attitude ! Think about it ! :)

Two Worlds Apart : Mocking-Bird and Bluest Eye

World is a ... a different rather a weird place like a vase which has the most beautiful flower along with thorny stick. Yesterday I finished To Kill A Mocking-Bird and today again I flipped the pages of The Bluest Eye , its like two worlds apart , not because one is about White people and other is about Black , but they give the feeling of two very different world with different views.

Two contrast novels - they give you contrast thoughts on all subjects. Lets take child-parent relationship first , Mocking-bird , I suppose , is a perfect guide to  child-parent relationship. It is all about what you should do for good upbringing of children and on the contrary , Bluest Eye is all what you should avoid.

There is not so much about beauty in Mocking-Bird like Bluest Eye , but it tells what courage is , and Bluest Eye also indirectly refers to it. Pecola , a little unusually ugly Black girl , goes to the local faith-healer and asks for "a pair of blue eyes" ..."as if it were shoes" ... but isn't it her courage which originates in the extreme desire to look beautiful which make her go alone to this person. And there in the novel Mocking-Bird , Atticus teaches Jem , his young boy that courage means to begin with something you have faith in and stick on it in spite of all odds.

Pecola , is  not unusual in her act of creating an imaginary friend who admires her , many people do the same , for one reason or another. I can't believe once I did the same and until after four-five years I came to believe that it was just an imagination. Its pitiable. But this is what happens when you are devoid of something - something which should be filled in your childhood. And in Mocking-Bird , the character of Atticus teaches you , how one can bring up one's children .

I would suggest you to read The Bluest Eye before To Kill A Mocking-Bird , because that would be the correct order to view things . First , learn the worst part of yourself , the society and the world and then learning how one can correct things , by correcting one's own thoughts or the way of thinking.